I am humbled. Truly and deeply humbled.
The faithfulness of my God even when I struggle amazes me. I wrote at one point about how God tore down everything in my life that I had built in order to lay a good foundation. This allowed everything that was built afterwards to point to God’s power to redeem; that it demonstrates not my glory but God’s.
He called me to move to Clifton and when I gave up control, He gave me a beautiful home with a faithful Christian woman that challenges, inspires and balances me.
I said no to the move from Cincinnati that I’d always wanted and stayed in a city I never loved and God transformed my heart and vision for Cincinnati; through my volunteering, classes and relationships I’ve come to see this city and her people for the beautiful love story she is.
Less than two months ago I left my job because I felt like that was what I was supposed to do. I spent time in prayer and reflection asking God to lead me. I struggled and fought, wept and submitted. I put all my trust and faith in God who I believed would show up where I had heard His promise. This gave me time to learn to rest, to learn to listen, to deepen my faith and better understand the call God put on my heart. When I was ready, He connected me to the most beautiful team of people whose mission is the same as mine; I wouldn’t have recognized that this was the ideal role for me if God hadn’t called me to leave when He did and I hadn’t responded with a yes.
Every place I thought I would feel stifled by my faith I have found instead to be full of freedom. I’ll make a lot less money and I certainly own substantially less than I used to but it turns out money and THINGS were never able to bring me joy, freedom and happiness.
This life with God is a series of contradictions; each step of the way I felt like I was sacrificing so much and on the other side I see that they were just chains being broken so I know the freedom found in this true love, in this real relationship.